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I spend a lot of time in trains, going back and forth between gigs. I really like the feeling of being in transit. When you are between two destinations it almost feels like you are…well…nowhere, really. Go rent the movie “The Darjeling Limited” and you’ll know exactly what I mean.

On the train you have time to reflect over things. I think I like reflecting at the moment. I have all these thoughts about my future at the moment. About my music, my family etc. Trying to figure out what this is all about and what I want from life. Even though you think you know yourself it can be hard to figure out what it is that really motivates you. Is it the acceptance of your peers? The need for love? Money? Sex? Fame? Immortality? I hope that what drives me is the need to experience new things in my music and to challenge myself, so I can continue growing as a person.

“I only strive to complete a work for the pleasure of making it truer and wiser.”
- Paul Cézanne

Life – for me – is about refining yourself. Getting better at something. Always struggling for new personal highs in physical, intellectual or artistic performance. The urge to improve.

Kind of an existential period I am having right now. I don’t know if this is relevant for anyone but me, but then again blogging is all about the ego, init?

I have always used a lot of aliases when making music. I have remixed under the name SuperTroels, made house as Mockin’ Bird and released a record called “I Know That You Know” entirely without an artist name. Maybe it’s time to just be myself?

Aliases and pseudonyms can be very useful when you want to wipe the slate clean and start a new direction in your music. It can help you better define the music you make (before you make it) to have certain rules or dogmas that you have to follow. I have separated my aliases in to different genres or styles of music. SuperTroels is – as mentioned before – primarily remixes. Mockin’ Bird is where I play with house and tech without any vocals. “I Know That You Know” was sort of a compilation of songs I had written over a long period of time. I didn’t feel that it fitted in any of my “boxes”, and therefore the release had no artist name but only a title.

The problem with these “boxes” is that I tend to create them, to try and redefine myself completely, every time I want to change my direction in music the slightest. As an example I didn’t feel that my Mockin’ Bird tracks fitted in a release to follow up “I Know That You Know”. A “solo album” was for me defined by myself singing on top of my own productions. As a result of this I push some of the songs in the direction, that I have decided they should go on beforehand, instead of just making the music and letting it go where it needs to go. Who says I can’t have three or four instrumental house tracks alongside a few more vocal-based tracks.

The albums I love are the albums that vary in sound and expression instead of being confined inside the walls of genre. The artists I love are the ones that are always experimental and curious. Not the ones who has defined themselves once and every sound from them since has been derived from that origin.

After thinking about this for some time, I have decided to try not to use the aliases and go by my own name from now on. It’s important for me to stress that this is not about having a cool name or appear in a specific way – that is not the point of these writings. This is merely an attempt to get rid of all the masks and do what I want to do, and not be so eager to be defined from the get go. I need to allow myself to change and still be myself.

I am taking a break from the festival and regaining my strength at the hotel. There’s three hours till we’re playing our show at the annual Spot festival in Ã…rhus. I am listening to the album “Wayne Coyne” by The William Blakes. It hits me every time I hear it, that I really think this is one of the best things to be released in Denmark for a long time. It’s a perfect record for being alone. It’s a perfect record for partying. It’s perfect for the bedroom (or wherever). For cooking, cleaning and plain relaxing. It’s just perfect. That’s all. Just wanted to give mad props to a fantastic album.

Now listen to this:

The William Blakes – The Secrets of The State

The William Blakes – Violent God

The William Blakes – The Magician